(no subject)
Oct. 23rd, 2005 04:39 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
anomic_blueholy hung over at work batman!
how trashed was i last night? i remember debating marxism and something that might have been existentialism or maybe spiritualism with tabby, quentin and ireena on toby's porch and the next door neighbour telling us to please be quieter. i don't think we were.
what was with that ampule of 90% nicotine that zandara found? i so want it.
hopefully i wasn't so drunk i became obnoxious. well, i was that drunk, but hopefully i wasn't obnoxious. at least i can't remember if i was- thats better.
did we walk home? that parts blurry. everything afterwards is shockingly clear though, for once i remember.
thank you for your message jesse. although i would not have called you last night, because i was very drunk and thoroughly distracted, it was good to know that you weren't dead.
i've decided that mission hills pinot gris is the fucking devil. seriously. i love the drunk it gives me- happy enough, though i start slurring pretty badly. but oh my god, i can't drink that stuff anymore. everytime i do, i get myself into trouble. well, not trouble exactly... situations. i get myself into situations. damn you white wine! no, no, its not the wine's fault, i know.
today is all bruises and soreness, aches and pains- and the i've never felt the fronts of my shoulders hurt like this before. everything hurts. its brilliant.
i keep trying to think my way through this, but i keep tripping up. i don't know why it bothers me, although i think we proved it only bothers me in some kind of bullshit intellectual way. i try to figure it out, but everytime i panic. its probably just going to be one of this things, you know? stupid brain, stupid neurosis, stupid internalized self loathing. forgive us these our trespasses...
i don't know i don't know i don't know... bite your tongue.
...
how trashed was i last night? i remember debating marxism and something that might have been existentialism or maybe spiritualism with tabby, quentin and ireena on toby's porch and the next door neighbour telling us to please be quieter. i don't think we were.
what was with that ampule of 90% nicotine that zandara found? i so want it.
hopefully i wasn't so drunk i became obnoxious. well, i was that drunk, but hopefully i wasn't obnoxious. at least i can't remember if i was- thats better.
did we walk home? that parts blurry. everything afterwards is shockingly clear though, for once i remember.
thank you for your message jesse. although i would not have called you last night, because i was very drunk and thoroughly distracted, it was good to know that you weren't dead.
i've decided that mission hills pinot gris is the fucking devil. seriously. i love the drunk it gives me- happy enough, though i start slurring pretty badly. but oh my god, i can't drink that stuff anymore. everytime i do, i get myself into trouble. well, not trouble exactly... situations. i get myself into situations. damn you white wine! no, no, its not the wine's fault, i know.
today is all bruises and soreness, aches and pains- and the i've never felt the fronts of my shoulders hurt like this before. everything hurts. its brilliant.
i keep trying to think my way through this, but i keep tripping up. i don't know why it bothers me, although i think we proved it only bothers me in some kind of bullshit intellectual way. i try to figure it out, but everytime i panic. its probably just going to be one of this things, you know? stupid brain, stupid neurosis, stupid internalized self loathing. forgive us these our trespasses...
i don't know i don't know i don't know... bite your tongue.
...
