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Oct. 3rd, 2005 01:00 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
anomic_bluei am so happy to be done work for another 3 days...
sometimes its really creepy coming home from work on sunday nights, because if the trains aren't delayed because of track maintenance, there's a good chance i'll be the only person in granville station and in that particular skytrain car. this makes me paranoid, and while i should be paranoid about muggers and ax-murders and rapists and other mundane evils (note to self: buy some fucking pepper spray already!) my brain likes to focus on the idea that when i get to broadway station and down the escalator... the surrounding area will be covered in eviscerated human bodies, rib cages ripped open, chest cavities open, steaming entrails ahoy like some bad monster movie. fuck you brain. why you gotta do that to me?
the other side of my brain, the side not busy imagining impossible horrors, is playing with this idea about how you and i should interact, and how i've developed this weird desire to restore your faith in the human experience, and life, and the small sensual joys of the world that keep us all from offing ourselves. but i mean, thats so egotistical, and also- i'm really not the best person for that, considering my limited experience with hope or my failure to talk about any subject with authority without sounding like a total know-it-all. but still, but still, i would find it so tragic if you came to believe the things you fear are true. i need you to believe in more than that, for both of us.
livejournal is fucking up the way this looks, but i'm too tired to resolve it.
sometimes its really creepy coming home from work on sunday nights, because if the trains aren't delayed because of track maintenance, there's a good chance i'll be the only person in granville station and in that particular skytrain car. this makes me paranoid, and while i should be paranoid about muggers and ax-murders and rapists and other mundane evils (note to self: buy some fucking pepper spray already!) my brain likes to focus on the idea that when i get to broadway station and down the escalator... the surrounding area will be covered in eviscerated human bodies, rib cages ripped open, chest cavities open, steaming entrails ahoy like some bad monster movie. fuck you brain. why you gotta do that to me?
the other side of my brain, the side not busy imagining impossible horrors, is playing with this idea about how you and i should interact, and how i've developed this weird desire to restore your faith in the human experience, and life, and the small sensual joys of the world that keep us all from offing ourselves. but i mean, thats so egotistical, and also- i'm really not the best person for that, considering my limited experience with hope or my failure to talk about any subject with authority without sounding like a total know-it-all. but still, but still, i would find it so tragic if you came to believe the things you fear are true. i need you to believe in more than that, for both of us.
livejournal is fucking up the way this looks, but i'm too tired to resolve it.
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